“Kom Huis Toe”

Why the title, “Kom Huis Toe” (Come Home)?

Well let us explain.

It all started on 8th September 2020, with a candle ceremony in honour of Dad’s birthday.

We couldn’t light a candle for Dad without lighting one for Mom and for Sharon. It felt right, after lighting the candles to sit in the glow of the candle light and spend time thinking about them, remembering them and sending out blessings to them, on their soul journeys. Respect given for lives lived.

Sharon came through very strongly, as a few of her favourite songs played randomly over the radio. Mom’s flame burned brightly, reaching out and stretching towards Amethyst while Dad’s flame burned strong and firm.

Then, in the midst of the calm, Amethysts mind (as it always does), decided that it was being ignored and needed a little attention (as it always does).

The first thought started with, “Why are you spending time with loved ones who have passed when you have your children and family alive and well in South Africa? You should be spending time there with them!”

And once that thought got hold… it was relentless…..

Nothing for the past 3 years mattered anymore. And then that one dreaded thought took hold again, “What the F&@# am I doing here?”, and it wouldn’t let go. That one thought, is like a little entity of its own. Once it gets hold of her, it’s like she needs to go through a spiritual cleansing to exorcise the little demon!

Nothing Sapphire could say or do would make any difference! So it would be best to avoid and steer clear of her or he could also be taken over and possessed by this all encompassing entity that had taken hold of Amethysts current state of mind.

But as always, there was a little glimmer of hope…. This time in the disguise of a birthday invite from Johan (part owner of the South African, Isirafu Boutique Hotel), to attend a brunch for his 35th birthday.

What a difference this invite made to her and just at the right time when she needed it. I’m sure you all know that feeling…”no one understands me (well how could they if you don’t even understand yourself), nobody cares blah blah blah….” And Sapphire didn’t even come into the equation… Why would he! After spending 24/7 for over 3 years with him, he is the last person she wants to even to talk to and most definitely the last person to be saying, you’re going to be ok!

So getting back to the invite…. She had to decline as it was for a Sunday brunch and ESL for LIFE, as always, takes preference.

But, a bit of retail therapy, to shop for a birthday gift and a quick pop in at Isirafu to wish Johan for his birthday (which was actually on that day), would hopefully lift her spirits and keep the demons at bay.

It was such a great feeling to shop for a birthday gift for someone, who we no longer consider just a fellow South African, but a friend. And shopping for a gift for a friend was something we hadn’t done in a long time, as friends are few (it’s normally just us, 24/7 remember!). Actually typing this, let us make a mental note that this also needs to change (LOL)!!

So, after a buying a gift at Zando’s for men, at the only shopping centre in Siem Reap, we arrive at Isirafu Boutique Hotel and are greeted so warmly by this beautiful soul and his wonderful partner.

And off course the usual pro-functionaries follow, “Howzit! How you guys doing?

But not the usual pro-functionary response from Amethyst, like, “we are good, thank you”. OH NO, not this time! This time, she let it all hang out!

And to add flame to the fire, a random call from Wesley and then a long overdue call from Michelle to seal the deal!

The reason for Michelle’s call. A mug that was sent from Cambodia, broke in her dishwasher leaving the shape of a broken heart.

Well, after lots of talking, laughter and “tears” Willie turned and said, we always here at Isirafu when you missing your family in South Africa, so just pop in whenever, “Kom Huis Toe”.

These words made such a difference. Yes, she had to accept that Siem Reap is now home and how blessed they are to have such wonderful people in their lives to share this journey and experience with.

Isirafu means “giraffe” in Zulu.

The evening ended celebrating Johan’s 35th birthday at a lovely restaurant in town called “Fellini”. Sitting there, feeling part of this special life celebration was what was needed to stop her feeling sorry for herself.

At Fellini celebrating Johan’s 35th Birthday.

We were both reminded once again, of how our thoughts are patiently and greedily waiting in the background, with outstretched hands, ready to grab that first tiny morsel of negativity. And once it’s in these greedy little hands, wrapping it in warmth so that it can rise, like a hot bun in the oven, burning it’s way through all the positive things in our lives.

Just a week before, a wonderful day was spent getting to know another lovely couple from South Africa, Lourenza and Russell. Lourenza, very much a kindred gypsy spirit and Russell, a big guy, yet soft like a marshmallow. How quickly we forget that we are surrounded by beautiful people who have made a difference in our lives.

Lourenza and Russel

Vivian, another young South African, who came and filled our afternoon with her bubbly positive outlook on life.

Vivian Fourie, a bubble of joy.

So yes, life in Siem Reap is not all doom and gloom like it felt at that moment. It is normal to miss and long for family and friends and sometimes we just need to be reminded that we are only human and that we need each other.

A holiday to South Africa in 2021 (as soon as the borders open again) is no longer a “would like to” but in reality a “must do”, as seeing our children, family, friends and loved ones is long overdue.

As for this blog, we dedicate it to the amazing South Africans we have recently met on our journey and who have made such a difference in our lives.

A huge shout out to Johan and Willie, at Isirafu Boutique Hotel… Ons sal weer “huis toe kom”!

Johan and Willie – check out the braai broodjies!